Goodbyes suck.

[Indigo]

So today I am extremely pissed off mainly because my best friend has moved to Italy with his family. I just feel that even though I spent a lot of time with him, I doesn't feel like that long. He's not just a friend, he's a role model and with him gone I just feel... angry, and I hate it. I don't even feel sad or the need to cry... I just feel really angry. You know that kind of angry when you want to punch everyone you see simply because they are not the person who I would rather be talking to right now. This will probably go on for a few weeks now, and all I want to do is sleep through it and forget about everything.

So I'm not very good with goodbyes as you can see. How do you handle goodbyes?

[Atlas]

They are hard, indeed. I have not really had to deal with this in my life to any significant degree yet. Most of the friends I have now, I have been friends with for most of my childhood to now. If they did move away, I know it would be very hard.

I still talk to my mom a lot, too; so I haven't experienced that yet, either.

I imagine when I do have to say my goodbyes, it will be difficult. I will just have to face that trial when it comes.

[Matron]

My dad comes in and out of my life a lot. It's not really the goodbye there that gets me, it's the reasons behind his disappearances. I was old enough to really know when both my grandfathers died, so that was hard. Otherwise, I don't really do goodbyes- I'm not around enough people to have to say goodbye usually.

[Indigo]

What I hate the most is that I should be trained for this sort of thing. I mean my family has to move, due to my dad's job, every 3 years. But I can never hold back my anger for some reason.

There was one point in my life when I just gave up on meeting people because I was scared of growing close to them because I knew how felt to say goodbye to a good friend. But friendship is probably the most important thing in my life I love all of my many friends, and would give my life for most of them. But when I stop talking to them for a while because I'm far away I just stop caring about my old friends and focus on developing new relationships with other people. And that is the worse part, because later on I realize how good my previous friends were and I just feel guilty.

[Matron]

Well it's a lot tougher to have to actually leave someone and say goodbye than it is to have your friends just drift away over time.

You can't let things like that stop you from forming friendships though, or you will end up very lonely. I speak from experience here.

[Powerslave]

During my schoolyears I went to 6 different schools, and in the past 10 years I've lived in 4 different places in the world at different times, so I've obviously had to say a lot of goodbyes to a lot of people. Some I've never seen again, and some have remained friends for many years now. Still, I don't really have a lot of problems with goodbyes because I always tend to move around and visit most of my closest friends, even separated by 3,000 miles, the conditions always place themselves to say 'Hello' again. The good thing is that nowadays it's virtually impossible to lose contact with people you wanna keep in touch with, with the internet nowadays, and the phone, etc. The point is that I've learned that goodbyes are never permanent unless you want them to be (barring, you know, death or some catastrophic thing).

[Blackdragon]

They aren't easy that's for sure. I had to say goodbye to my friends and family when I moved to western PA, and I have no clue when I'll be able to go back and see everyone. I sure do miss them.

[Polygon]

It depends on the person.

However, I've had to say goodbye to people in the past in that manner and my feelings were mutual. What's even worse in when you don't even communicate with them anymore. That hurts even more.

[Phakiel]

I have this thing, its really odd, but most people i get close to, eventually sway away from my life, I am constantly rebooting friends group, never the same people, i can go totally from hanging out with some people one year to other people the next.

Like, my friends from High School. I have absolutely no contact with one single friend from high school except my friend Rene who is a hardcore gamer like me, so we both visit the main local gaming forums and we talk about stuff on msn sometimes. But other than him, no one else. Every time i run into people from High school they are like "OMG where have you been, whats up with you anyway, man you look old". I still wish happy birthday to a friend because we share the same birthday so every July 11 i call him and wish hima happy birthday. Thats it.

From college, of my top 4 friends from college, one is in jail becaus the idiot got into drugs smuggling, another lives in California (she was recently visiting and we had a blas partying), another lives in Florida (the one from the picture of me with the two fat chicks) and the last remaining one, he is still around but he currently is apparently in love with his current girlfriend and we hardly party anymore, i guess because we partyed like singles and now he aint. He is the last one.

Now out of my other friends whom i met on french classes, one failed me and i dont consider him my friend and with the others, sometimes we go out to dinner but its like once a year or something. Sad.

But i digress. I guess accept godbyes, doesnt mean they dont hurt, but as my life has been built, i think its normal and just move on. I think there is an upside from rebooting, and a positive thing on the fact that I always find new people to connect with, no matter where I am.

[Jarrid]

Yeah, I am not all that great at conclusions period. I have not really had to say goodbye to somebody close except for one time when my best friend moved out to Arizona. I really do not remember it much, but I remember just giving him a hug and seeing him off. I also am bad sometimes with ending phone calls. I start mumbling and rambling random words until the call ends.

[Sushi_b]

I guess we all have different ways of dealing with it. I know that for myself I have very little problem with it any more. There was a time when it was a bigger deal but not so much now. I think it's because of the revolving door of friends/co-workers that I've met over the past few years. You get to know them, spend time with them, but you move on. I have very little contact with anyone back in my home country, maybe say hi here or there to a few friends but that's about it. Don't even talk to my own family. So perhaps I'm the wrong person to connect to in such a discussion but I'll still throw out some thoughts.

We all have to deal with it at some point of our lives. It's a matter of looking at the positives and going from there. If you really want to keep a strong relationship, you will do it. If you don't then you won't. Just don't expect a large majority of the relationships to stay strong. It's far to difficult for it to work out that way because of the lack of actual contact. Just be strong and keep your head up. Be thankful for what you have/had. It's a journey that continues.

[Raidou]

At least you got the chance to say goodbye there, be thankful there. I'm not good in goodbye either, even worst accepting death of a close friend. But that is another story :-(

[Baby]

Just said goodbye to my boy for a few months :( Very very very very sad. Got a twist, big twist in my tummy. :(


I've never actually had a problem with goodbyes before. The last time I remember being upset was when I was much much younger and had to change schools.

[Cyrus the virus]

I just kind of force them. But I don't really think I've had to say a difficult goodbye. The closest thing was my ex and I breaking up, but she's a whore so it doesn't exactly bother me now. At the time it was heartbreaking.

[Mary]

I hate goodbyes so I don't do them. Before leaving to move somewhere new I usually just leave. If someone feels the need to say goodbye to me they can come see me. I learned long ago though that the easiest way to leave is to not tell anyone the date you're leaving and just enjoy non-depressing time until you do leave.