Kicked out?

[Atlas]

Just had a huge fight with my mom, and apparently I don't do enough around here... It's not like I paid the ****ing rent for three months while she was out of work while recovering from surgery(lung cancer). Nope, I don't care at all, I guess. **** that shit, man. Now she's threatening to kick me out? Why? because I apparently don't do enough around the house. Talkin' all this shit about how I don't care...

Anybody else had to face this threat? Or actually been kicked out?

[Phakiel]

Mother and I have pretty much come to an unspoken agreement to be roommates and share some of the costs even though she still pays for utilities but since we both spend all day out of the house, its not that high. I pay for internet and I think soon, cable.

We each buy our groceries and whatever else we need for ourselves.

I havent been clos to get kicked out but when I was in high school and was a problem child she did once said she didnt know what to do with me and that she was gonna send me abroad to study at a military academy to get straightened out. Thats the closest thing.

[Evil]

I buy the toilet paper.

Try kicking me out and see what happens!

[Phakiel]

OHHHHH You got da POWAH!

[Electric Banana]

My Mom kicked me out a couple of years ago (before I started at CSU-Fresno) over a ridiculous situation. (You know, one of those ones where your parent wants to keep arguing with you, and you're just tired of the argument, so you say "okay Mom, you're right," and you walk away? Yeah, it was one of those.) So anyway, I went and crashed at my grandma's house for about a week and a half. Then my parents decided I could "come back home" if I started choking down anti-depressants because I'm so "bi-polar" according to them... Which is amusing, because at that point in my life, it was probably the happiest and most stable I'd been since my childhood. At any rate, I started choking down the Effexor XR, then a few months later I couldn't deal with the nasty side effects and went off of them about a month before I lost health insurance (May of that year).

So yeah, been there, done that. If I lived near you, Atlas, I'd let you crash on the couch!

[Jarrid]

Damn, man. I really do not know what to say. Sorry to hear that. I have not experienced anything like that, and I have been very fortunate that my family wants me to live with them. It kind of makes me feel bad because my dad wants me to live with him; my mom wants me to live with her; my grandparents want me to live with them. Right now I am living with my grandparents, but I still feel bad for not spending enough time with either my mom or dad.

[Blackdragon]

I've been threatened with it before, mostly because I wasn't living my life like my parents intended (When I stopped going to school pretty much). But that has no bearing on anything now since I moved out and am living with my fiancee now. They can make whatever threats they want now.

[Matron]

I always had a good enough relationship with my mom that I never faced getting kicked out, but I did move out twice while I was growing up because of my dad's BS. Once in 10th grade and once right after I graduated. Not running away from home so much as refusing to live in the hell that he was causing at the time, but my mom always knew where I was.

Maybe your mom was just having a bad day, and tomorrow everything will be better again. I hope that's the case anyway.

[Baby]

I, uh, stopped living with my parents a long time ago! :o

[Less Than Liz]

I don't regularly live with my parents. I've gotten the threat a few times, and respond by shrugging and trying to leave, only to have my father refuse to open the door. Just say, "Fine, if I can afford to pay your bills, I can certainly afford to pay my own" and start packing.

[Polygon]

Nope, never.

Not that my father wouldn't be happy if I weren't living here. On the other hand I think my mother will suffer from empty nest syndrome. Regardless, I'm back on my feet and once I can get approved for the loan I'll be buying my own house.

[Cyrus the virus]

I figure if you're our age, early 20's, still living at home and not doing enough around the house, you deserve to get booted out. I do a lot of the cooking around the house, and some other minor things, plus I pay a small rent. Makes sense to me.

[Atlas]

My point was that I do help a lot. I'm 20 years old... and about to begin school. I'd love to move out, but I need to think about this kind of stuff in advance instead of having to make decisions on a whim that may actually be very bad in the long run. I need something extremely stable while I'm going through school and working full time.


EDIT: We talked it out, btw. We met half-way in the arguement and decided we both needed to change a little if we were going to make this work(even if it wasn't going to be for long).

[Inari]

Speaking for myself, I didn't experience stability in my life until I moved away from home and cut off financial ties from my parents. The thing I guess about being too co-dependent with your family is that you run the risk of never establishing your own sense of accountability and personal identity.

My suggestion to anyone having family issues in their late teens or early twenties is always to move out, get a job, and go to school if they're inclined to. Honestly they scare the shit out of you telling you how hard it is to live on your own but it's not hard it's just not a cakewalk, and seriously if things at home are even a little bit unstable you're better off setting off on your own.

Also, I hear a lot of people say how they need to stay home to get ready to move out, which is utter bullshit. You will never be ready to live on your own until you do it, and every day that you don't do it, you're less ready.

[Atlas]

Utter bullshit is a bit of an exaggeration if you ask me. Obviously I cannot speak from personal experience, but I would think applying simple logic to the situation may help increase your chances of success.

[Cyrus the virus]

I pretty much agree with Inari there. I don't think I'd have ever moved out if I didn't just get up and do it. The only thing you need is a bit of money or a work ethic.

[Atlas]

I have a lot of work ethic. I love work. Honestly, I just feel the need to know that my mom's going to be alright after I am gone. She just recovered from lung cancer and is really off and on health wise. Just a little peace of mind would do me good. It'll come.

[twerp]

Speaking for myself, I didn't experience stability in my life until I moved away from home and cut off financial ties from my parents. The thing I guess about being too co-dependent with your family is that you run the risk of never establishing your own sense of accountability and personal identity.

My suggestion to anyone having family issues in their late teens or early twenties is always to move out, get a job, and go to school if they're inclined to. Honestly they scare the shit out of you telling you how hard it is to live on your own but it's not hard it's just not a cakewalk, and seriously if things at home are even a little bit unstable you're better off setting off on your own.

Also, I hear a lot of people say how they need to stay home to get ready to move out, which is utter bullshit. You will never be ready to live on your own until you do it, and every day that you don't do it, you're less ready.

That's actually really good advice.

[Sushi_b]

My suggestion to anyone having family issues in their late teens or early twenties is always to move out, get a job, and go to school if they're inclined to. Honestly they scare the shit out of you telling you how hard it is to live on your own but it's not hard it's just not a cakewalk, and seriously if things at home are even a little bit unstable you're better off setting off on your own.


More or less. It's not as hard as most people think. It's a challenge some times and you have to give up some things that you love, depending on your budget, but it's preferable. The amount of freedom, responsibility and independence really do help you find yourself. You can easily do it.

Atlus, your situation sounds more like it was a difficult fight and you just need some time between the 2 of you to cool down and work it out. I'd be quite surprised if it gets more extreme then it is, but feel confident knowing that you can do it if you have to leave. Been there before buddy.

[Raidou]

Kicked out? Nah. Is not something Asian families will do. It will be a disaster.

Big fight/ quarrel with mum? Yup, is common. Generation gap, different set of thinkings/ perceptions on how the world and things work, and etc -- all these are pretty normal in all families. I pay for everything since I'm the bread winner of the family. Is tough but is all about being responsible.

Atlas, go on and talk nicely to your mum as soon as possible. Nothing is more important than family. No matter what happens next, I'm sure she loves you.

Ego and Pride <-- shelve all this yaa. No good.

[Mary]

My mom and I never reall ever fought. I was always pretty much a perfect kid who sometimes made bad grades. I only live with my parents in the summer and december now. They live in Kenya though so if they tried to kick me out I'd just get my flight moved up and go back to my apartment.

[Atlas]

True, true. Thanks, guys!

[Jarrid]

So Atlas, did everything work out alright?

[Mark]

I got out when I was 18. yeah 3 years on my own now. its nice but I never came close to getting kicked out...it was opposite my parents didnt want me to leave. but I have ran away a few times in the past. /:

[Liam McDohl]

Never even close. Even with the crap my brothers get up to they've never been threatened with it, so I'm completely safe.

[Atlas]

So Atlas, did everything work out alright?

I'm still posting, aren't I? ;)

Well, we came to the conclusion we both need to compromise more. I agreed to help out around the house more often, and she agreed to let me live here. :)

My time to move is soon, though; I feel it.