Depression

[Matron]

Yep, title says it all. Depression, how do you deal with it? Not deep, clinical depression, where you need therapy and meds to keep you going, but those phases that we all go through, where we feel like crap, like everything sucks and is never going to get any better.

How do you get over this, how do you feel better? I ask because these past couple of months I have been feeling worse and worse. Little things make me cry, and it just seems like everything is too much to take right now. The best way to describe how I feel is like my skin is made of egg shells, and one wrong word is just going to shatter me into a million pieces.

I try to be more like my husband. He doesn't let stuff get him down, he just has that "**** em" attitude to life and family, that I just don't have. I care what people think of me, and it really gets me down and hurts me that there is no one in my family (not hubby and kids, more inlaws, aunts and uncles, that family) willing to help out.

So how do I get past these feelings of breaking apart, how do I feel better, how do I just suck it up and develop that **** em attitude?

[Phakiel]

I drink.

Alcohol.

[Devil King]

My depression fades over a set amount of time. To speed up the process, I try to hang out with friends as much as possible.

[Atlas]

Yep, title says it all. Depression, how do you deal with it? Not deep, clinical depression, where you need therapy and meds to keep you going, but those phases that we all go through, where we feel like crap, like everything sucks and is never going to get any better.

How do you get over this, how do you feel better? I ask because these past couple of months I have been feeling worse and worse. Little things make me cry, and it just seems like everything is too much to take right now. The best way to describe how I feel is like my skin is made of egg shells, and one wrong word is just going to shatter me into a million pieces.

I try to be more like my husband. He doesn't let stuff get him down, he just has that "**** em" attitude to life and family, that I just don't have. I care what people think of me, and it really gets me down and hurts me that there is no one in my family (not hubby and kids, more inlaws, aunts and uncles, that family) willing to help out.

So how do I get past these feelings of breaking apart, how do I feel better, how do I just suck it up and develop that **** em attitude?


Seriously Dire, you are worth the happiness that can be experienced in life. You as a human being, who obviously has a very tender heart, can be happy.

The funny thing is, though, is that the more compassionate we are, the more we seem to hurt. Which actually makes sense if you really think about it. Life really can seem futile at times, and the monotony of things just kind of leaves you in a haze.

Here's my advice: do something about it. Go on a walk by yourself while the sun is setting; make love to your husband with vigorous passion; let a thing you love dearly go so you can appreciate it if you ever get it back.

Take risks, Dire! Believe you can live.

[Electric Banana]

I drink.

Alcohol.Glad you followed that up with "alcohol" people may have been concerned you meant urine or something. :p

Depression is ugly. I had major depression through all of my teen years until I was 19. Back then, I was on meds and I was seeing a shrink. Since I was 19, I rarely get bogged down, more specifically since I was 21 and had a bout of Shingles. Realizing that I was that stressed out to come down with Shingles, I learned to not go crazy over things that don't really matter.
My major escape from depression has always been playing the piano. I taught myself at an early age (9 years old) and have been playing since. I've been wanting to get my hands on a tenor sax or a flute(because I used to play those in high school) and have yet another musical outlet. :)

Most recently, when I attempted to move to Phoenix, I became overcome with this overwhelming sense of depression. I just laid on my air mattress and read...and cried. I "gave up," so to speak, and instead of continuing to feel like I was suffering, I came back to my hometown. And it's amazing, I feel so much better. I never in my life thought I'd say "I miss being in Fresno," but I said it.

[Jarrid]

Yep, title says it all. Depression, how do you deal with it? Not deep, clinical depression, where you need therapy and meds to keep you going, but those phases that we all go through, where we feel like crap, like everything sucks and is never going to get any better.

Um, well I am clinically depressed and see a psychiatrist as well as a psychologist. I've been a guinea pig for the past year and a half now, and I'm still trying to find the right medication. How do I deal with it? I try to stay active. I have to push myself to go out have a good time. Being with my friends also help out sometimes. If I don't maintain that kind of schedule, I am thrown into suicidal thoughts every night. However, right now I am taking a type of medication the doctor and I did not think actually think would work, but it is actually helping out a whole lot. I suppose it pays off to know a lot about medication and psychology sometimes. Though, I am risking a lot by taking it. I get hardly any sleep at all, and I can not seem to eat anything without throwing up, so I am not sure. I am not depressed, but I guess all of the bad side effects do not really help out in other areas. Oh, well. I have lived with since I was 15, so I am somewhat use to it now.

[Matron]

My family has a long and painful history with alcohol and drugs, so I try not to drink just because I feel bad. I'm not knocking the practice, I just figure why tempt fate and risk giving myself even more problems to deal with?

I do know from my daughter that the side effects from the meds are often very bad. She's not depressed, but I think they use a lot of the same medications for seizures as well as for depression. ( don't know why, lol) They made her so sick, not eat, made her have rages, so we finally had to stop giving some of them and switching to others. I'm sorry you have to deal with depression so severe.

I've never been that bad, I've never had what I'd consider real suicidal thoughts, although I have often thought it would be better if I just weren't here, and I have done stupid stuff like self mutilation (only a couple of times though) and chopping my hair off myself. Mostly I just lie around and cry when it gets bad though. Today was better than yesterday, if yesterday hadn't bothered me so much, I wouldn't have even made this topic here today.

And Atlas, thanks. Just for those words, and taking the time to say (type) them out.

[Phakiel]

Glad you followed that up with "alcohol" people may have been concerned you meant urine or something. :p



Hey, you never know.

[Jarrid]

I try not to have a clutch on alcohol or drugs, but it always tends to happen in some fashion or other.

[Matron]

I find myself sinking more into books than anything else. That's something I've always done though, when I was younger, my folks used to worry about me because I wouldn't leave my room for days and weeks (other than for food, showers, and bathroom breaks) because I'd shut myself up with a bunch of books. Even now, sometimes I find myself reading pretty much constantly, and letting other stuff slide. I have to watch myself on that, or things can really start to pile up around here.

[Raidou]

Alcohol doesnt solve anything. It will only have you forget the problem only for the time being.

Depression is tough. I'm facing it right now too. Office workload is building up more and more each day. Family commitment is heavy as hell. I hardly able to breath if I don't let it out somewhere, somehow. I usually choose releasing my stress in video gaming, especially fighting games. Other than that, I count my blessings each day. Blessed with my daughter and an understanding spouse. Well, at least they are healthy, and me too. So, Andrew don't think so much. All problems are temporary, they will go away especially if I think of solutions for it instead of sitting down here doing nothing. No point worrying, it only adds more grey hair, and more sleepless night ahead.

p.s: Alternatively, Dana, you can always choose to share with us here in a small but cosy AllRPG community. Ohh you are already doing that already. There are always people willing to listen and give advice yaa.

Problems shared are halved, happiness shared are doubled.

[Mary]

When I get depressed I usually lock myself in my room for a day and read or cry or pamper myself. When that day is up I usually get a group of friends together and go downtown and drink.

Alcohol.

[Matron]

I really try not to get depressed because I realize that despite the various "tragedies" I have been privy to, I have it better than most people in the world.

Still though, I do get down from time to time, which I guess is natural. They say you drink to forget and I guess I do try and do that. I also like to sleep if I am feeling down, if I can, because it helps.


I always try to remind myself of that too, especially when I start to dwell on my daughter's situation. I remind myself of all the other kids we've run into on our various hospital stays who are so much worse off, and it helps, but I'm still scared of what the future holds on that end.

But the other- sometimes it's tough. It's tough to understand why my grandmother, who gets out all the time, drives to frickin Indiana when she wants to, never comes to visit me when I live 15 minutes away, and wouldn't drop my son off at school because she might be late for bowling, or why my uncle, who's worked for the local rescue squad for decades can't come give my other grandma an insulin shot to help out, or my in laws will do anything in their power to help out the other grandkids and kids, but not my husband and my kids. Days when all that piles up at once just leave me wondering what the hell is wrong with me? That's where I need to work on that **** em attitude, I guess. I'm getting better at it, until I have to talk to one of them, then I usually end up losing it again.

[Inari]

Not everything works for everybody, but I know how I feel when I get depressed and I know what kinds of changes work for me. One of the big issues I have when I get depressed is I tend to feel a lack of control--that I'm subject to overwhelming events and emotions. The biggest breakthrough I had in my life so far was learning how to feel more in control, and it doesn't take a massive overhaul of your life, either. Just the way that you look at it.

1.Structure

If your typical day isn't already very structured, it may help a lot to relieve some of that perceived burden by implementing some structure into your daily routine. This could be anything from waking up and going to bed at the exact same time every day, to watching what you eat, to doing a specific productive activity for a set amount of time every day.

2. Exercise

Taking even half an hour every day to do get your heartbeat up will give you some tangible structure to fall back on, and truly makes you feel better physically and better about yourself.

3. Smile

It sound stupid. But it's 100% true, that smiling will make you feel better. The brain chemistry of being happy is intimately related to the behavior and thoughts of being happy. Happy brain chemistry will make you think and act happy. Thinking and acting happy will alter your brain chemistry.

4. The power of thought

This also sounds like BS, but it's not. Example, most people don't like working, exercising, or doing laundry. When I do these things, I say to myself "I love going to work!" or "I love doing laundry!" and without fail, it makes me feel better. Why?

The way you feel about something, let's call it "X", is not just about the inherent attributes of X. It's also largely about your attitude towards X. Attitudes are much more malleable than people like to think.

Try it. Whenever you're going about your daily life and you feel down, say something positive to yourself.


You can't artificially make yourself a different person, or change the stressful things in your life. And life is full of countless stressors. The healthy kind of "**** em" attitude comes naturally when you have a sense of control over your life, and a positive attitude. You can implement control, and you can slowly change your reaction to life's stressors.

[moogle]

I find depression is most exacerbated when I'm bored, so I try to eliminate boredom when I can.

[Jarrid]

Those are some great examples of how to go about things, Inari. I find all of those to be very helpful, and any psychologist, counselor, etc. will pretty much say the same thing, which has been said to me plenty of times. However, I will add in meditation whether it is deep or just a quicky. I find it to be extremely useful whenever I am just having a horrible moment or day. On another note, entheogens within the tryptamine family as well as MDMA also help out my depression in a lot of ways, but I hardly take that route any more.

[Baby]

My depression recently has had many causes but mostly serious medical conditions? How do I deal with it? Sake cocktails. Bad idea...

setting myself straight :p Writing works better and no hangover or raised eyebrows.

[Inari]

However, I will add in meditation whether it is deep or just a quicky. I find it to be extremely useful whenever I am just having a horrible moment or day.
This is extremely helpful for a lot of people, but i tend not to mention these sorts of things because you definitely need a certain kind of mindset to utilize meditation. For a lot of people, meditation and the principles behind it are very counterintuitive. Not impossible to learn, but difficult to embrace.

I have a very "que sera sera" attitude about life. I always have, and so Daoist/Buddhist principles make a lot of sense to me. It doesn't make me immune to stress or emotional pain, but it does alleviate them when I'm having bad days or bad moments.

I won't go into it because it tends to sound really corny and lofty but I will agree that there is a great deal of merit in different forms of meditation as a tool for mental health. (I don't meditate but I do have mantras and visuals that help me significantly).

[Matron]

I'm not really sure if meditating would be right for me. I don't have any experience with it, but from what I've seen, you have to sit quietly in one place kind of doing nothing, and I hate to do that. I might be getting the idea wrong though, but I've never been able to just sit, I have to have something occupying me, whether it's tv, book, game, or computer. I tend to go a bit bonkers if I have to just sit for too long.

[moogle]

Sorry to post again. I hadn't read all the posts beforehand, and...

I really try not to get depressed
Yes. Because that's how it works, right?

I literally LOLed at that.

And I know I took your quote out of context. Sorry.